Adjusting to college is hard.
Even if you’ve learned how to work the washers and dryers before you leave for school (…try not to flood the floors), you have to learn how to study in a new way, how to understand budgeting differently, and how to live in a more independent way….
When we leave for college, we have a mindset of what will occur and what your life will look like.
Perhaps it’s that you will remake your identity, there will be no friend-drama, professors won’t care about attendance to classes, and you won’t miss your family/home community. Life doesn’t always go as planned. Our expectations for life sometimes derive from the movies/tv, social media, hopes/dreams/desires, and/or what we are told from others. Sometimes the reality matches these narratives, other times it slightly matches, and sometimes it’s the complete opposite. We all function differently around our expectations not meeting the reality.
When our expectations don’t match what is laid out in front of us, it evokes feeling of disappointment, shame, anxiety/depression, loneliness, and a desire to escape.
These are definitely not the emotions any college student wants to experience as they adjust to campus life.
I encourage you to start by giving yourself a break (figuratively and literally).
Literally, you make need a small time out to reconnect with something that brings you a sense of comfort and feels familiar. Maybe that’s going for a run/walk by yourself, playing Roblox in a corner in the library, or heading off campus to find a good cup of coffee. I do not recommend spending time on social media to see what your friends from high school are doing nor trying to see what your peers on campus are up to. Delete it off your phone if you have to during your break. The figurative break, is offering some self-compassion. This is hard. Be kind to yourself as you find your footing. No one needs to bully themselves as they are already having a hard time—it won’t help, but just make you feel worse…The goal is not to feel worse.
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